Grammar: Not always high brow

Sergeant Anous, formally with the normal police, now with the Grammar Police, has a word with Timmy Blumpkin, contraction violator and reigning douchenozzle, then busts cheat sheet dealer.

Sergeant Faraday responds to a domestic grammar dispute.



I'd like to think I'm more judicious about the use of force. But I do keep fresh Duracells in my grammar tazer and holster full of pens. Lol Grammar Police. Gotta love your copy editor.

Autocorrect: Not so common typos

You already know to look out for the common typos and homophones. Train your eye for the errors on you’re own time. Their everywhere. Often the errors involve the apostrophe; sometimes its a simple typo. Spelling and grammar checkers might alert you, but you should perform the check to. If deadline’s got you on editorial triage, than at least please your client by not missing those common mistakes.

Depending on your project, at-risk words likely have an impostor standing by. You can sharpen your project-specific proofreading by customizing Word. For instance, if you’re working on reports for public entities, save yourself unnecessary embarrassment: Tools/AutoCorrect Options/Replace: pubic/With: public (unless you’re working on docs for a pediatrician).

Be careful with AutoCorrect. The printed world is still in need of a proofreader. You’d do well to keep an eye out for less common typos too. Corrections of the following mishaps mark a triumph for the profession:

calendar | calender
compiled | complied
compliant | complaint
filed | field
form | from
of | if

How ’bout it proofreaders of the world? Expand on that list in comments.

Hot for Typo

Many folks are fond of critiquing public signage; some even take vigilante action (as reported by blog Laughing Squid). Here's one from the Boston Public Library's special reserves desk near the sixty-minute Web room:

Check back in 30 minutes if your pager doesn't flashes.

Pretty advanced verb agreement stuff going on here. The present tense, third person auxiliary verb, with negation, doesn't, is correctly paired with the subject, your pager [it]. But flashes is conjugated to match the third person too: it flashes. Huh?

Here's what Latent Print pulls from trusty ol' MW's Collegiate (spend more time with your dictionary, k?): In the auxiliary form, do is "used with the infinitive without to to form present and past tenses ... in negative sentences." If all that grammar gibber sounds as ridiculous to you as the above sentence, you're probably fine just trusting what sounds right to you: Check back in 30 minutes if your pager doesn't [to] flash.

Beware, however, that a simple fix could throw the author's meaning even further from the mark. What if the author meant to direct you to check back if the pager flashes? What if it's a rogue doesn't? Oh my.

How do these flubs get printed? Latent Print readers, I leave the imaginary journey of that sentence to you, in comments.